Daxiang 2

First time I feel really bad to wake up in the morning. Thinking that I still have to go on alone, I really feel sad. I think of nobody to help me, thinking that can I let go everything today, thinking of escape. I even think that if I die accidently at that moment, will everything able to continue? That was my first time having that feel. Usually when I wake up from a night's sleep, I will be fine. But not for that few days. I wondering am I slightly in depression already?? Anywhere, that is few days ago already.

Thanks for the OH card workshop by Ms. Nicole on Thursday. We are having group counseling session by using OH card. I am so shock when I get a card, with the right hand chopping down the left hand with a hammer. Its painful... I discovered that I am hurting myself by what I do. I am cutting myself by my negative thinkings, and cannot let go like a child's attitude. The second card, with a hand writting on a paper and with blank word. I dont understand, so I get another combination of card. The 3rd one is a green signal traffic light with a GO word, and the word suppress. I know I need to move on, but suppress......??

Thanks Ms. Nicole. She told me that I really need to learn how to ask for help. She said "Ask for help is OK!!" I do really need to learn about that. Yup. It need time, but I wish that I can do it..